Harvest Moon: Pride Parade
by AelazaHarvestMoon
Summary: Based on Animal Parade. On an island of religious homophobia, two  more than  friends set out to discover that almost all of the men there are gay, and most of the girls are straight out of Mean Girls. Rated M for yaoi lemons in Chapter Two on.


**A/N: **I am a long-time reader of Harvest Moon yaoi stories here, so I figured what the hell, might as well, dance a tango to hell. This is my first shot at something like this, so please comment. I want to know how I can improve. The story is based off of Animal Parade, but Jack is the hero from ToT. The intervals between chapter postings will be erratic most likely. So... yeah. Enjoy. I hope.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harvest Moon.** I know, I was surprised too.

**HARVEST MOON: PRIDE PARADE**

Chapter One: This is a Rainbow-Free Zone

Castanet Island: a beautiful, tranquil setting. Farms nestled among large fields, a dense forest, a bountiful, yet quiet mine on a mountain, and a cute little pastel-colored town. At its centerpiece, a large, extravagant Church, which all the little townspeople attended on Sundays to hear the lovely words of Perry, the young new priest. Blindly accepting of the man's words of a strange twist on Christianity with two Gods, one male and one female, were all of the townspeople.

Enter Jack, the gay farmer.

Yeah. Gay.

Well, not necessarily a farmer yet.

But still gay.

He was average-height with brown hair, one patch of which always wanted to stick up and could not be stopped. His eyes were big and innocent, his face that of a child, though he was twenty-one.

The particular day of his arrival, was, coincidentally, New Year's Day. The young man had taken a ferry from the mainland to the sprawling fields belonging to Horn Ranch. The owner of said ranch, a thirty-something-year-old man named Cain, drove Jack closer to the town, where he was met by Hamilton, the mayor. This fat gentleman, with whom Jack had previously contacted to buy a chunk of land, brought him to his new house, a run-down little shack. Jack eyed the house suspiciously, feeling ripped off (then again, how many gay twenty-somethings from the city drop everything and start a farm?)

But to add the cherry on top, mayor Hamilton then informed him that he wouldn't settle in until later; they had to go attend the New Year's Church service, of course! Never the religious type, Jack tried to consider that at least he would meet the island people.

They entered the Church to see a multitude of people sitting in rows before a short man with blue hair, reading from a comically gigantic book. The door closed behind them rather loudly, prompting an awkward pause of various people turning to look, but after a moment in which Jack and the mayor took seats in the back, Perry went right on, talking seriously:

"And then, the Harvest King said, 'Let there be fire, so woman can cook shit.'

And the Harvest Goddess said, 'And to light the fire under man's ass to get off the god damn couch.'"

'Amen's echoed through the room.

"And then, the Harvest King proclaimed, 'Let there be fire, so I can see woman's breasts.'

And the Harvest Goddess said, 'And let the light shine in man's eyes in the morning so he can get the fuck out of bed.'"

More 'amen's.

Jack sighed and rolled his eyes. This was going to go on forever.

"And lastly, the Harvest King maintained, 'Let there be women who sleep with other women, cuz that's hot.'

And to that the Harvest Goddess concluded, 'But let a man never sleep with another man as he would sleep with a women, since the hot ones always seem to be gay.'"

The final 'amen's. It was over. But Jack was unclear on something.

As most of the attenders headed for the door, Jack walked up the aisle determinedly toward Perry, who was closing the big book carefully.

"Excuse me, sir?"

The priest smiled serenely. "What can I do for you, my son?"

"That last thing you read. The Harvest Goddess says that homosexuality is wrong?"

"Only for men, my child."

"Right. So, no men are allowed to be gay on the island?"

"That is correct," answered Perry, still smiling.

Jack stared, unnerved. "...Whatever."

He left the Church rather angry, but decided that none of the islanders probably took this shit seriously either. He decided to go and meet the other townsfolk, but before taking the path back to town, he caught a glimpse of a mine cart on the Church's left side in the corner of his eye. Curious about the path that seemed to stretch under the Church, Jack climbed into the cart, but was startled when it automatically started moving.

The cart accelerated through a pitch black tunnel at a surprising speed. Before Jack could start to guess how this operated, sunlight hit his face once again. In front of him Jack could see a huge mountain, with what looked like little beehive-shaped houses sticking out of its face. At the bottom was a cave opening, out of which came one of the loveliest things Jack had ever seen. It was a young man: a beautiful, sculpted creature with the face of a god. Red hair protruded from his head, and the only thing covering his bulging chest muscles was a tight black sleeveless shirt.

_Wow_, Jack thought. _Are all the guys here this hot? _He regretted not looking closer at the Church.

Suddenly very aware of his staring, Jack unsteadily got out of the mine cart and approached the red-haired man, who was at this point facing away, cupping his hands at his mouth and calling toward the first house in a line of buildings that lay parallel to the cave opening.

"Chloe! Forgot my hammer."

"Hey."

Jack mustered up the courage to speak to him. He turned around, surprised.

"Oh, hi. You're the guy who just walked in on the Church! The Mayor had been talking about a new farmer moving into town..." the man chuckled, flashing a brilliant smile. Jack hoped he was not blushing, and forced a laugh.

"Haha, yeah. My name is Jack." He was blushing.

"I'm Owen." He extended a large hand, which Jack took rather daintily. Owen shook warmly, Jack savoring his touch.

"Anyway, I was just planning on doing some mining- that's what I do, by the way. I work for the Blacksmith, Ramsey. Do you want to come along?"

Jack shook his head, looking down shyly. "No thanks, I'm going to meet the rest of the town."

"Ah, of course."

"Here."

A tiny, pink-cheeked girl had approached, holding a large hammer.

"And you should really remember such an obvious thing."

"Thank you, Chloe," said Owen, ignoring the last statement. "Jack, this is my little cousin Chloe. Chloe, this is Jack, the new farmer."

Chloe was uninterested. "Whoopee." She ran back inside.

"Sorry, she's a bit shy... anyway, see you!"

"Bye," Jack mumbled awkwardly.

Owen waved and showed his fabulous smile once more before retreating into the cave.

Jack then took a long walk, knocking on the doors of the other buildings near the mine, then looping around past his farm to the town. He met many people, some nice, some men, some cute, but none as much as Owen, in his opinion. One guy, a flamboyant man with long, purple hair, Jack thought must be gay, but wasn't that interested in him, being more of a submissive type himself.

The tour of the tiered town was nearly over: Jack, having just bid farewell to Hayden, the town bartender, and his friendly, busty daughter Kathy, approached the last building of the town. He was intrigued to see that it was a Tailor's Shop. Being a bit stereotypically gay, Jack was interested in clothes and stuff like that. Yeah.

Behind the counter was an adorable little old woman named Shelly. After introducing herself, she told him to go meet her two granddaughters, who were presently in the living space behind the store. Jack went through the door Shelly motioned to.

"Are you gay?"

The question was asked quickly and precisely by a female voice. Mystified, Jack looked around the living room-like area for the source, and finally found it in the form of a short, pink haired girl sitting in a chair at a desk. While the chair faced away from Jack, the girl's head was turned toward him.

"Well?"

"Luna! Don't be so rude!"

Out of the corner, a blue-haired girl that Jack had not noticed, all dressed in blue who had blended in with the blue wall behind her stepped toward the short girl nervously. She then acknowledged Jack, looking before walking over a bit shyly.

"I apologize for my sister's boldness. But, I see that you are the new farmer... nice to meet you. My name is Candace... my sister is Luna."

She spoke rather monotonously. "Hi. I'm Jack." Jack tried to sound friendly and interested, but was still rather disturbed by Luna's question, and was further provoked when she stood up to approach him.

"Are you or not? And Candace, you don't need to be all polite around him, he could be a friend."

"Umm..." Jack was thoroughly confused now.

"Come on, we don't care about all that shit Perry talks... the rest of the town may care, but most of the best designers are gay."

"Okay, I am, but-"

"Yes! I told you, Candace, pay up."

"Damn." Luna's sister clenched her fist rather uncharacteristically.

"My gaydar never fails." Luna was smiling now, her hostility long gone.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm a bit... shy. I don't have many friends, besides Luna." Candace explained herself as if exhaling after a no-breathing contest: swift and relieved, though a hint of personality seemed to peek through.

"Never mind that. So, Jack, you into fashion?"

"Hell yeah."

The sisters smiled at each other. "You don't understand how much we've needed you," Luna stated genuinely.

It was the beginning of something wonderful, like that song from The King and I.

**A/N: **I hope you liked it! As I said before, please comment with any feedback. Chapter Two onward will most likely have a lemon every chapter. Just be forewarned. I'll post the next chapter... sometime. ;)


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